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So just a quick note. In answer to Kenda's question, Amelia and I are hoping to visit in August, as we did last year - courtesy of the proud grandparents. I wanted to come on my own in March or April, but finances will not allow it. I really, really, really wanted to. But broke is broke.
Kenda, I hope you are doing OK and are not too exhausted by parenthood. I promise to e-mail you soon.
Cold here, by English standards, -7 today. Not much else. Too tired. Good night.
My new niece.
My sister Suzie's baby was born yesterday, at around 8 p.m. Keira Lea, 8 pounds, 4 ounces. I know you're not supposed to care which sex it is, but I'm really pleased she turned out to be a she. A little girl cousin for Amelia to boss around - er, I mean play with. And of course I have a cupboard full of girly clothes for her.
I told Amelia that Auntie Suzie had had a baby and that she was her little cousin, and Amelia smiled and said, "Come?" As in, "When are they coming to visit?" Alas, not any time soon. They live in Fredericton, near my parents, on the East Coast of Canada. I'm so bittery disappointed that I can't go over in April. There was a really great seat sale too. I hope we can go in the summer (Amelia and I), like we did last year, and have a nice long visit. That's six months away, though. I want to be there right now. Wah! (Now who's acting like a baby?)
Mum called tonight. My sister's water broke, but they sent her home from the hospital because she hadn't started contractions yet. Did I mention that my sister is expecting a baby? It's the first for her and her husband, and the first cousin on my side for Amelia. (Her other two first cousins are Ian's sister's children, who are 18 and nearly 16.) I'll be waiting anxiously for news - apparently they'll bring her back into the hospital within 24 hours if nothing's happening. Mum said it will probably be in the middle of the night, and I jokingly said there would be a big snowstorm as well - but apparently there is one predicted. Eek.
Just one last note about Max. A couple of people have asked what we said to Amelia. We sat her down when she came home from Nursery on the day Max died. She already knew that Max had been to the “doctor” and so we told her that he was quite old and he was sicker than we had thought, and that he had died, which meant he wasn’t coming back. She just looked at us blankly for a few seconds and then ran away and started playing something. It didn’t seem like she understood, but you can never be sure how much children take in. She woke up that night crying, which she hadn’t done for a while, and hasn’t had a really good night’s sleep since.
We went down to Brixham today, on the coast just outside Torquay. Ian's sister and family are down there for a four-day break (it's school half-term here). Interesting little working fishing port, very much with its own spirit and not a quaint tourist town. I liked it.
Finances are a bit tight at the moment. The vet's bill for Max was quite large, which threw a bit of a spanner into things - not that they were great to start with. I predict a lot of sitting around in the house - I'm afraid even to go into town because I always see things I want to spend money on.
Still here. Still sad. It's a nice, sunny day at least. Thanks to those who sent their condolences about Max. Keep forgetting that he isn't asleep upstairs on his blanket. It bothers me that we don't know what he died of - I can't help but think if we'd paid more attention somehow, or had more money to spend on blood tests, etc., he might not have died.
Can't think of anything else, really. Just wanted to say hello.
Our older cat, Max, died at 5:30 this morning. He was 13, or possibly a little older, since we got him from the Toronto Humane Society and never knew his exact age. It was a shock - he was fine (relatively, given his age and the fact that he had arthritis) until Friday morning, when Ian found him on the floor, unable to stand up and obviously in pain. Ian rushed him off to the vet, where they x-rayed him and said he had "massive" osteoarthritis in one of his legs. They gave him an injection of painkillers and sent him home with some painkilling pills and others to help rebuild his cartilage.
By Saturday afternoon it was obvious that he still wasn't well. He still couldn't get up, he wouldn't eat or drink or go to the litter tray. Back we went to the vet, where they gave him another injection of painkillers. On Sunday, it seemed like he might be recovering a little - he took some food and walked around a bit. But on Sunday evening he kept hiding - always a bad sign with a sick cat. Then he threw up the little food he'd had.
This morning we heard him making strange noises (he was sleeping on a chair in our bedroom). Ian went to see him and found him on the floor, where he convulsed and died. When we took his body back to the vets (they will cremate it), they were also surprised that he had died. They said it must have been something unconnected to the arthritis - an undiagnosed underlying condition, perhaps. We also think it could have been a reaction to the painkillers, but we can't know for sure.
We are very, very sad. He was a lovely cat. He was with us for ten years, and was a good and loyal friend. Just writing those words brings tears to my eyes.
We had our Chinese New Year party yesterday afternoon. It went very well - a small group, about 11 adults and 6 children, and a nice mix of ages and personalities. We hung up for the first time the big silk 100 butterflies wallhanging that we bought in Changsha. I also put up some traditional scrolls with good wishes and a paper lantern, plus two lovely round fabric lanterns lent to me by a friend, and we had Chinese rice crackers and other snacks, and dumplings.
Other than that, things are pretty crap. The weather has been cold and gloomy, none of Ian's or my job applications have amounted to anything, and Ian is still waiting for people to decide both on giving him any consulting work, and on funding for his PhD. The little bit of editing work I was doing before Christmas has completely petered out and I haven't managed to get anything new. I'm beginning to think it's a lost cause in this part of the country, unless you've brought clients with you. I'm feeling very sad and frustrated and helpless. Or is that hopeless? I'm not sure.